What is that device?
“Never break the silence unless it is to improve it”
Ludwig van Beethoven
Hi!
If you’re looking at these photos you’re probably wondering: what is that device? Why does she have that on her leg? Or maybe you can’t even make it out yet.
Lately I keep saying “It’s less terrible than it looks.”
I was born with MILD fibular hemimelia (I recommend you google it). Informally, I have one leg shorter than the other.
- Oh! NO! WAIT! I HAD one leg shorter! (Insert mental cool emoji with sunglasses.)
I had surgery to lengthen my limbs. Yes, they broke two of my bones. An OSTEOTOMY, “and your jaw stays right where it is”, as my doctor would say hahaha.
And well, it hasn’t been an easy decision, even less so when people make you feel unsteady. When I mentioned I was having surgery, many imagined themselves injured and unable to keep up their pace of life for a while, and it scared them. I saw all sorts of reactions, some more exaggerated, others subtler, showing in body language.
And are you sure?… Ugh, that must hurt like hell… Is it necessary, wouldn’t you be better off staying like that?… Bones are super complicatedIT CAN GET INFECTED…Nooo, I’ve always been careful not to get hurt, it takes so long to recover afterwards!… And are you sure?
Others put themselves in my place, within my reality and my options; some just listened and others cheered me on (thank you to those who didn’t hand me their fears).
I realized their fears weren’t mine, that mine wasn’t an injury or trauma from an accident, but surgery that would improve my quality of life both physically and psychologically: from being able to dance and play sports with more confidence in my body, to looking in the mirror and seeing myself symmetrical (yes, OK! OK! I know the human body isn’t perfect and imperfections are beautiful, but let me be).
In the face of all those comments, which I know weren’t ill-intentioned, I went ahead with my idea, because when people speak from ignorance there’s a good chance they’re not on point, whereas if you trust your instinct you can be unstoppable.
Knowing I’m able to believe in my decisions makes me feel powerful and more excited every day about what’s coming with this new body.
I look at these photos and feel like a cyborg. I can say I am one, and I’ll be able to say I was one.
I’m grateful.